Saturday, August 14, 2010

Ways to Spot a Missionary

I can't stop reading, and laughing at, the posts at Jon Acuff's site Stuff Christians Like. Here are some excerpts from a recent post entitled "Ways to Spot a Missionary." This was a guest post written by a missionary.

"Missionaries wear funny clothing.

I never intended to where bright-striped Kikoi shirts with tassels. I don’t think my wife Sara imagined herself in Kanga dresses with large shoulder pads. But I’m telling you as my shirts begin to look like I was worked over in a rugby game. And as all of Sara’s dresses have strangely faded to the same shade of gray, those Kikoi shirts and Kanga dresses become really tempting. So at your next church mission conference if you see a missionary dressed like a banana, cut them a little fashion slack."

From Dave: Is this true, those of you who know us, do we dress funny?

"Missionaries throw car safety rules out the window.

My first week at Kijabe I see 8 missionary kids hanging off the roof rack of a Toyota Land Cruiser bumping down the road. The next day I see a baby girl in mommy’s lap cupping the steering wheel rounding the corner Britney Spears style. (I think the baby honked at me too?) Last week I see four teenagers perched on the doors of a Landrover like they are windsurfing. I don’t pretend to understand this recklessness, but on the other hand I think the car seat Nazis back in America have gone too far (8 years old and/or 80 pounds)? By this standard, once my small daughter Amelia reaches 16 years of age she may have to take her drivers test sitting in a Graco Snug Ride."

From Dave: This is definitely true, I let my kids ride on top of jeepneys, here's proof.

"Missionaries are longwinded.

I know when I meet someone and they start talking about their trip to China and all the cultures, towns, language, and people they met. Well, if the story is longer than a few seconds my eyes glaze over as all I can think of is, “But did you get to walk on The Great Wall?” So if I start talking about the Meru tribe, on the NE slope of Mt. Kenya, in Eastern Africa and their Bantu origin and your eyes glaze over…I’ll understand. You just want to know if I saw a lion on safari?"

From Dave: Guilty!

What makes this site so hilarious is that so many of his posts are so VERY true.

Read the full post here.

2 comments:

  1. I remember the first time you visited CLC, you showed up in one of these: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barong_Tagalog

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  2. Next time I speak I will go totally native and wear just a loin cloth.

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